Ep. 33 Dobhar-Chú: Ireland’s Terrifying Otter

This week on Kraken Cans Cast, we dive into the legend of the Dobhar-Chú, Ireland’s terrifying half-otter, half-hound cryptid. We explore its origins, historical sightings, and the most famous encounters with this mysterious creature. Plus, we discuss Ireland’s lack of natural predators today and the various theories about what the Dobhar-Chú could really be. Crack a cold one and join us as we uncover the truth behind this legendary lake monster!

Follow us on all major social media platforms @KrakenCansCast and reach out to us at KrakenCansCast@gmail.com

Transcript

Tonight, we're diving into the legend of the Dúá-Cú, also known as Ireland's King Otter.

And trust us, this is one cryptid you don't want to meet in the water.

And if you do...

What up, what up, what up, and welcome back to the Kraken Cans Podcast.

That podcast, we talk all things cryptid, all things urban legends, and all things just a little bit spooky.

Spooky, he got it, nailed it.

I was a coffin this time.

Yeah, you weren't a coffin, we're dying.

And today, we're in, I don't know, Otter territory?

Ireland.

Ireland, okay.

I think we're talking about two separate things right here.

We're talking about otters in Ireland.

Irish otters.

It's crazy.

They're redheaded.

It's nuts.

Hell yeah.

Are these the, well, if, so if we're going to Ireland and talk about otters, won't they be otters?

Ooh.

Could be.

Or just, yeah.

Or just o's.

Otters.

Otters?

There you go.

It already has an O.

You just got to throw an apostrophe in there.

Yeah.

Otters.

Otters.

Otters, otters, otters.

We got some otters.

We do.

Hold, man.

We always have otters going on down here.

Not so much right now, but no.

It smells pretty good down here.

Yeah.

All things considered.

But we're sticking around in Ireland.

I know I did the Leap Castle recently before a Reddit episode, and that was in Ireland.

And I missed the boat, so I'm still in Ireland.

Still in Ireland, which is good, because we're just kind of putting parentheses around St.

Patty's Day.

One week before St.

Patty's Day, week after.

Big old sandwich.

Big old sandwich.

Maybe some poor planning.

We probably should have.

We had some stuff came up.

Yeah, we couldn't quite get there, but either way.

I drank some green beer yesterday for the cast though.

Yeah, you did.

Yeah.

I worked so long that when I got home, I just instantly just fell right asleep.

I couldn't even drink a beer.

Yeah.

Not interested.

Well, if you want to make a green beer today, I left the green dye down here for you.

You're feeling frisky.

Yeah.

Well, now frisky, I'll get to it today.

We'll see my beer.

We got other colors upstairs, too, if you're feeling real frisky.

Oh, you got purple?

Yeah.

Yeah, we got some purple.

I like purple.

Blue, red.

Blue, red.

So if I'm putting this dye, what beer do we have today to put it in?

That was a good.

That was a good throw over.

Tie in.

Yeah.

Today.

Today.

We got a good one.

I said that for you.

Oh, yeah.

It's our second beer from Miss Pillion River Brewing Company, which is out of Milford, Delaware, called Space Otter.

So the other one was not today, saying which what episode is that for?

Was that for, was that Ouija?

That was longer than the spreadsheet.

Yeah.

How long is the spreadsheet?

You bring it in the beer.

How's that sound?

Yeah.

It sounds good.

So this is a 5% American Pale Ale.

So on the lower end of the spectrum for our beers, but higher than last week's Garage Beer.

I'm not going to talk too much about the brewery since we already did that previously, but I'm just going to talk about how I tied this topic in with this beer.

So the Duaku, with its cryptic and elusive nature, could be imagined as a cosmic traveler sent from another world to mystify and intrigue those who encounter it.

The name Space Otter evokes the image of a playful, otherworldly creature, almost like it's been beamed down from another dimension.

Much like how the Duaku, Duaku might be seen as a mystical being from an unknown realm.

Duaku.

This would be another one like a good chant for, you know, wrestling, like Duaku, Duaku.

Or we bust out the Ouija board and start chanting that and see what happens.

That'd be good.

Maybe like stand in using in some like rattlers, like rattlers, maybe some snake rattlers.

Snake rattlers.

Snake rattlers.

Stand there shaking them.

I'm sure that would bring out something.

Yeah.

I'd probably just go home.

That's what our life came down to.

Probably send me away.

The not today Satan, you were close.

It wasn't Ouija, it was the five hauntings we used before.

I didn't think, I thought we, it seemed like we drank that so long ago.

I mean, it was sitting in the fridge for a long time.

That's probably what it was.

Yeah.

Probably just felt like that.

But yeah, I mean, that's the biggest reason I picked this beer, is not only is Otter on the can, but it's space Otter.

Oh, what?

Dude, whatever.

You just picked it because of Otter.

No.

It's just like, Otter.

Otter.

And Otter.

Boo-koo.

And boo-hag?

No, that's what we got for the beer.

And so far, I like it.

I guess I'll cheers with this since you're just hammering it down, and I haven't taken a sip yet.

It's pretty good.

Yeah, it's really good.

Goes down smooth.

Yeah.

This is a lot.

We were talking a little bit before we went on.

I don't think we cared that much for the Not Today Satan, if I remember right.

I remember that one was like, you could really taste like the alcohol in it.

Yeah.

And had like a really strong just like aftertaste.

Yeah.

Almost.

But this one, this is good.

This is like good hop taste.

The good hop taste I like.

I really like, I like like a maltier.

I don't know.

It's weird to say a maltier and hoppier ale.

High in the I, what is it?

IBUs?

That's like the hop scale.

High IBUs.

Yeah.

IBUs.

But hey, with that.

With that.

With that.

You ready to dive on in?

Oh, I'm ready to dive in, baby.

Let's go.

Face first.

Here we go.

Mm.

Why you make that noise?

All right.

So we'll just start with the biggest, broadest question of them all.

What is the Duaku?

The majority of my information on this episode is from an article that Rachel Rafferty wrote on irishcentral.com.

irishcentral.com.

Titled, The Myths and Legends of Ireland's Hound of Deep, the Duaku.

Hound?

Oh boy.

All right.

Here we go.

Buckle up.

Buckle up.

Duaku is a cryptid from Irish folklore, which translates to water hound or hound of the deep.

It's said to be a cross between a giant otter and a hound.

The size ranges from 7 to 15 feet, and it's said to have a long, sleek body covered in dark, shaggy fur with a broad head, sharp teeth, and a thick, muscular neck.

Are we talking otter head or dog head?

From what I'm seeing, I think it's...

It's kind of like half and half.

Like it's...

I would say more of a dog head.

Okay.

I feel like you only said that because you knew I was going to look at you until you picked one.

So you just...

And you're just done.

Dog.

All right, let's move on.

Its most distinctive feature is its tail, which is long and powerful, resembling that of an otter, and is said to be an expert swimmer.

Able to move swiftly through lakes and rivers, it also has a taste for human flesh.

Because what doesn't that we talk about?

I mean, we might.

There's a good chance.

Lock up your children.

The Kraken Cans Cast in town.

Maybe.

We might just kill you, too.

I mean, we might just kill you and feed you to the pigs.

Have bacon later, and then we'll be kind to eat and you second hand.

Yeah.

I keep the pigs out back, baby.

Out back.

In our travel trailer.

I don't keep it parked here, though.

So the Duaku is sometimes called the Irish crocodile or king otter.

Dude, this thing is wild.

There's some awesome nicknames out there.

There's a half dog, half otter that they call the gated.

I know.

I know.

He's a little bit of Erdang.

Yeah.

King Otter.

Like that.

Yeah.

Some claim the Duaku is Ireland's version of the Loch Ness Monster.

OK.

So it's a whale penis.

Could be.

Yeah.

But not not America's version of it.

Dobhar-Chú.

This dude seems to be...

RIP.

He got bounced, and he's just...

We'll have like 400 episodes, and we'll still be making random champ references.

I don't know what it is.

We like that feller.

Yeah, he's our boy.

But the duaku, so this dude seems to be more ferocious, and less of a hugger, more of a biter.

Okay.

So champ, that's why we...

That's why I kind of do that out.

He's the opposite of champ.

We still love you.

The Duaku lives in several different bodies of water, such as lakes, seas, rivers, and he even lives on the land, can live on the land.

It's most commonly associated with lakes in the north western parts of Ireland, where many of its sightings are rooted in folklore.

And these areas are typically isolated, surrounded by dense forests or rugged terrain, which makes the perfect hiding spots for the elusive creature.

And I think I might mention it later, but I'll just mention now.

So it's like the like north western part of Ireland, where this thing like resides or where it's been seen.

There's also like hundreds of lakes.

Okay.

Like hundreds of lakes in this area as well.

It was like Minnesota.

Minnesota.

Over in Minnesota.

They got all kind of lakes over there.

They got lakes in lakes.

The land of many lakes I heard.

Yeah.

Or is that what they call the butter?

What's the butter company?

Lando Lakes.

Oh, yeah.

Anyway.

Yeah.

Just move on from this.

That's not even...

I didn't even make a good joke.

I just like Minnesota and lakes and butter.

All right.

Go on, bud.

That was horrible.

The creature is believed to be deeply connected to the waters and inhabits, emerging only to hunt or defend its territory.

Stories suggest that it prefers the depths of the water, moving swiftly and silently below the surface, but can also be seen on the shore or even chasing prey across the land when necessary.

Because of its association with these wild mystical landscapes, the Dobhar-Chú is often portrayed as a guardian or an ancient force tied to the very essence of the Irish landscape itself.

So like some things I saw, it was seen as like the protector of the land.

So like kind of almost like an elemental spirit, so to speak, that we talked about in the League of Castle episode.

It was kind of like what I was getting, kind of reading into it.

You kind of wonder if a lot of cryptids, that's like their thing?

Yeah.

Just to chase you off the land?

The land, yeah.

I don't know.

I think of like Mothman.

Was he trying to like chase them out of Point Pleasant?

Was that his way of warning them that bad stuff was about to happen?

Yeah.

Chase them out of it?

Could be.

I don't know.

Yeah.

Think you can kill this thing before it takes you out?

Yep.

Well, good luck.

Oh, jeez.

Because right before you kill this thing, What?

It lets out a terrifying high pitched whistle.

Now Mike, I got a question for you.

Okay.

What do you think happens after this creature lets out this whistle?

Your balls just explode.

Does something happen to you or to him?

Or to the earth?

I would say nothing happens to him.

Okay.

But I would say you're fucked.

I don't know.

Did you just go in like a state of shock?

I guess.

And your ears bleed, and your toe falls off.

Okay.

Also, your nipples get hard, and you get back pain.

Is that your final answer?

And a sore throat.

Yeah, that's my final answer.

So there are normally two of these creatures that travel together.

When one of the creatures lets out this whistle, it alerts the mate who then comes out of the deep water, forest, wherever it is, and will avenge its mate and pursue you until you're dead.

So I nailed it.

Yeah.

Because all those things are going to happen when the mate's ripping you apart.

So yeah, nailed it.

You go through a little bit of each of that.

That's crazy.

Once you're dead, it'll eat you.

So it's like, it says here, we should work in teams.

Those things just always work in teams.

Yeah.

So let's add a little whistle and then some of this just comes out of like the depths of the lake and just out of me and you.

Who's the whistler and who's the chaser?

Whistler and the chaser?

Yeah.

Can you whistle?

Kind of.

Yeah.

Don't don't go off.

We can whistle because it seems like that's just two chasers.

Yeah, we're both chasers.

We don't get a lot done.

Yeah.

All right.

So you got a little history of this bad boy.

We got some history on this bitch.

Oh, jeez.

The Duaku can be reported back to 1684.

And I'm going to go over one of the first reported sightings at the end of this due to, I think it's copyright infringements.

Yeah, due to I think it's the most fascinating and credit based encounter.

And then there's some also little things about it that's kind of still there today for people to see.

Word that I think kind of gives some type of validation to this cryptid.

Oh, hell yeah.

Oh, hell yeah.

Yes, sir.

There's too much.

There's too much pause.

I just, I just yell word.

I feel like it should be my job to fill these pauses in for a second.

And I'm trying to teach myself.

You don't need to.

No, it's OK.

Because editing pauses out.

And I do it a lot.

There aren't many written reports of the Duwaku, as most of the legend has been passed down through oral storytelling and tradition.

It's a lot of oral happening.

A lot of oral.

This is like, it seems like it's a European folklore thing.

A lot of oral tradition, a lot of, almost like fairy tales, Brothers Grimm type things passed down through generations and generations.

Scare your kids.

Yeah.

Yolk-ass stuff.

Yolk-ass.

Anyways.

Gwylia.

Gwylia.

In 1896, a woman by the name of Ms.

Walkington reported seeing a Duwaku.

Her encounter was published in the Journal of Royal Society of Antiquaries of Ireland.

In her report, she described the creature as being half wolf dog and half fish.

Half bear, half pig.

So there are some things I've seen where people say it's like half fish, half dog.

But I mean, the otter dog is the most, I guess, that I've seen, but I've also been seeing some fish, fish dog.

But no matter, all the stories, it's some kind of aqua dog.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I feel like the otter makes the most sense if it comes out of the water.

Yeah.

I feel like it'd be easier for a dog and an otter to make lovin, make babies, then like a fish and a dog.

Fish are slimy.

Yeah.

They're always...

Anyways.

Anywho.

So, history.

A few months after this being published, a fellow by the name of Mr.

H.

Chicester Hart Oh, that's awesome.

Responded to Ms.

Wokington's claim and said that he heard rumors about a gruesome creature called Duaku, which is said to be king of all lakes and father of all otters.

I can see this old guy just coming out and saying, Oh, yeah.

You know about the Duaku.

Oh, yeah.

He's been around a time or two.

Now, let me tell you about this son.

I feel like on the scene on Jaws where the guy just runs his fingers across the chalkboard.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's like I picture him just stepping out, like this dark corner stepping out of the town meeting.

Like, what is this thing?

What are we going to do?

I've seen this thing seven times.

Yeah.

I've lost four fingers to show for it, but he kept me some.

Supposedly, the Duaku lives in many lakes and bodies of water throughout Ireland on Akeel Island in Shrahines, Laos in County Mayo is where the largest number of modern sightings have been reported.

However, many of these reports are unsubstantiated.

And just for geographic purposes, this area in Ireland is the northwestern side of Ireland, right, like right on the Atlantic Ocean.

So if you go right, you know, right off of Ireland where we're talking about, like right there's good old Atlantic.

Yeah.

Hey, hey, you doing, David?

I'm the ocean.

I'm moving in.

I'm the AO.

The ones that live in this lake are said to be migratory and do not live in the lake for the entire year.

So do a lot of these lakes tie together somehow?

I think yes.

Yeah, I think a lot of them do.

I think some of them even like have some type of canals and stuff that eventually get right to the ocean too, which we'll talk about a little bit in some of the theories that I have later on.

So in 2000...

Oh, so we're making a big...

When was that?

The last one was the early 1900s?

That was like late 1800s to 1896.

Okay.

So now I'm going...

This is another popular one that was in 2000, and then after these, I'll get to the grand data.

All right.

Yeah.

So in 2000, an Irish artist named Sean Corkoran and his wife claimed to have witnessed a sighting of the Duwaku in a lake on Omi Island, or Omi, it might be Omi, Omi Island, County Galway.

This area is approximately a two-hour drive south of the Akeel Island mentioned before.

So we're still in the northwestern side of Ireland, just a little bit more, a little bit more south from like the encounter from the last encounter we talked about in 1896 or whatever.

This creature could swim between the areas by way of the Atlantic Ocean.

Pretty so like, yeah, like the ocean's right there.

So if it needed to, you know, get to like other lakes and stuff, they could just jump out there and just get right down, just swim down pretty quick.

Makes sense.

And then you're in a different, you're dipping your toes in a different, different water.

Yeah.

I'm getting a little taste of different meat.

Yeah.

Possums, the other white meat.

Corcoran describes it as a large, dark animal creature with orange flippers.

The creature reports, oh wait, Corcoran reports that the creature swam the width of the lake from west to east in what seemed like a matter of a few seconds.

He also described the creature as having webbed feet and emitting a strange high pitched whistle.

Well, you better watch out.

I know.

You better watch out.

It's some bitch just whistling while swimming.

Korkorin concludes that it finally leaped onto a huge boulder and before disappearing, gave most, like the most haunting screech that like he's ever heard.

Ooh, that's pretty good.

Yeah, thank you for working on it.

Bedroom stuff, classified, you know what I mean?

Yeah, I won't tell everybody about that.

So how big is this lake, you know?

This lake that he's talking about?

Yeah, that it swam across in a matter of seconds.

I think it was a pretty big lake.

I don't know, like feet, stuff like that.

But I think it was a decent size lake, but it just swam across the sheet really quickly.

You're the expert, man.

You tell me.

That's what I'm telling you.

Okay.

It was a mud puddle.

He just stepped across it.

Son of a bitch.

And then this is, I saw this, this is pretty interesting.

So the, the Duwaku is sometimes viewed as a younger or less developed version of the more famous Loch Ness Monster, Nessie, which I have a hard time getting behind this because just like with the descriptions of Loch Ness Monster or like other versions of Loch Ness Monster.

Yeah.

You don't have legs.

Yeah.

Could this be like, like when certain Pokemon evolve, they like lose, like they go from like all fours to standing up right.

Could this be like, yeah, like he evolves?

Could be.

Maybe like an Otter's the first stage evolution.

Yeah.

Once they hit level like 16, they evolve into Duwaku.

What Magic Harp and Gyarados.

Yeah.

That's like the most badass evolution of Pokemon, in my opinion.

It's up there.

Yeah.

It's got to be top three.

Top three.

It's got to be.

It's got to be.

I'll fight with anybody.

Yeah, he will.

I've seen him.

He went to Fist of Cups with the guy down the street the other week because that dude's like, hey, Squirtle's the best starter.

And Cory's like, the hell you said that, you son of a bitch.

So like I said, I have a hard time believing that it's a younger or less developed version of the Loch Ness Monster just because of the descriptions by both creatures.

The only real similarity that they share is being in the water.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Because the one has fur, like big teeth.

Like I would never look at Nessie and think anything otter dog related at all.

Not at all.

Yeah.

Like it could be like a cousin or something along those lines.

But yeah, boy, that family tree gets freaking weird.

Yeah.

Well, yeah.

Go to West Virginia, it gets a little weird too.

Mountain mama, take me home, old country road.

Love you, John Denver.

So the Duwaku is linked to the Loch Ness Monster through Irish folklore.

The connection, that connection with them being like, whatever, similar or whatever you want to say, dates back to the seventh century when Irish missionary, not the act.

I was going to, yeah, I assumed.

I assumed, not that.

Yeah.

Saint Columba first sighted Nessie and used his spiritual powers to save a man from the creature.

This event led to a myth that Nessie's offspring came to Ireland to avenge Columba's actions, with some suggesting that the Duwaku might be one of these vengeful descendants.

Because Loch Ness is in Scotland, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

My brain didn't even connect that they're not in the same country.

Yeah.

I mean, sometimes my brain wants to think that they're the same country, but-

Yeah, I don't know.

They're very similar.

Yeah.

From an American standpoint, Scotland and Ireland, they sound very similar.

I'm sure people over there are like, oh, that son of a bitch.

I just gave him an Asian accent there, I think, more than anything.

You son of a bitch.

Oh, you son of a bitch.

Yeah, I don't know.

Yeah.

But yeah, I don't know.

I get Scotland and Ireland confused all the time.

Especially like their accents, too, I feel like.

Yeah.

Similar.

Yeah.

But that's just from us fat Americans.

That's right.

Now talking in Russian.

Speaking of being a fat American, you know, like I told you, I like work.

I don't know.

I work way too many hours yesterday.

You worked a lot.

Yeah.

So I got like, I called out.

It was like 11 p.m.

at night.

And I just worked all day.

Worked all through the night, all day.

And we finally like went to it, went to Wendy's to eat dinner at like 630.

But from 330 till 630, all I could think is was a baconator from Wendy's.

Like I had it in my head.

I saw a cow across the field.

And I was just like, Oh, I wonder how much bacon I can get off this cow to make my burger.

I was even worried about the actual burger part of it.

I wonder if I can make cow bacon right now, and have me a fresh baconator.

You're probably like hallucinating at this point.

Oh, I was starting.

We like pulled up.

I like parked behind the one guy, and it hit the break, and it was like a couple of minutes we had to break.

And I just like shut my eyes, and I opened them up, and it was like 15 minutes later.

It's like, pull.

I did it before in a red light.

I was sitting at a red light.

I closed my eyes, and dude, I was probably out for a couple of minutes.

I think I missed like the green light like two or three times.

I think there's nobody behind me.

It was out like a pretty like busy red light usually in town.

Tell me what light this was.

I'll take it out.

Uh, it was, I can't really tell you without giving coordinates away for the people.

That's what I'm saying.

I'll take it out.

Oh, that's what I just said.

Oh, you're going to take it out.

You drive your truck or like the light out.

I'm taking the light out.

I'm taking it out.

Yeah.

I'll give you yours.

The one right by like going like like the four way there.

Yeah, it's like a five way.

That one.

Yeah, it was that one.

Okay.

It was like a weird time of the day.

Yeah.

There's nobody behind me.

It was during daylight.

Yeah.

I don't remember what time it was, but dude, I fucking fell.

I fell asleep.

Gee, but Lickers.

Yeah, it was at least a couple of minutes.

I know driving.

I've worked all night.

I'm driving back to the garage.

It's like 5 a.m.

Oh, yeah.

You know what I found a trick was?

This trick does not work at all, but it's-

Energy drinks.

No, no, no.

It's what I always convince myself.

Well, crunchy foods is really good, like pretzels or something to munch on, but I let one eye sleep at a time.

So I'll drive down the road and I'll just like, all right, I'll give this eye a minute.

Well, it never works because my other guy eventually goes close to.

Yeah.

So I hit the rumble strips, you know, but it's like, it's just like, well, just give old righty a break.

Oh, yeah.

And the left one.

Oh, and the right one.

It's like, son of a bitch, righty, you're supposed to wait till the left to go back on it.

You're supposed to be on lookout.

Yeah.

Now we're both dead.

Yeah.

Never.

Like when you're so tired, you really try to convince yourself of some things that.

My stepdad, he sleeps with one eye open sometimes.

Does he?

It's freaking scary.

Gripping his pillow tight.

I don't know if.

Yeah.

Like I'm scared of the Sandman.

I remember coming into the living room before, he's sleeping on the couch and it's just.

I'm like, oh, hey.

And it's like, he's asleep.

He's asleep.

It's the scariest shit.

Dude, that would freak me out.

Yeah.

Scary as shit.

Oh, man.

I don't even know where we were.

We're still in.

We're almost done with history.

Yeah.

That all started from Wendy's cheeseburger.

Damn.

That whole tangent we just went on.

So just to reiterate, Western Island is where the majority of the sightings take place.

And also, there's hundreds of lakes littered in this area.

So, I mean, I think there could be something hiding in that area.

You know, it's not all.

Sturgeon.

That might.

That's what's one of our theories.

I know.

It was a champ theory.

I knew it was going to be a sturgeon.

You blame for everything, man.

They catch a bad rat.

Just because they've been around.

Yeah, they can never see a sturgeon, though.

They look awesome.

Yeah, but also like creepy as hell, like to see them in the water.

It looks it looks like you took a step back in time.

Yeah, yeah.

So I can see why Sturgeon comes up as.

The answer.

There's some bitches get big.

We're talking.

We're talking big.

Yeah.

Big, big.

Well, I'm looking at a picture of a sturgeon right now, just because I want to see one again.

The bony looking fossilized, shiny bitches.

They look cool, though.

I'd put one in my fish pond.

Yeah.

I don't have a fish pond.

I was going to say, where was your fish pond?

We filled that shit in and built a patio.

I was going to say, I've been to your house.

There's no fish pond here.

There once was.

All right.

All right.

So you want to take us into some of the most famous sightings and encounters of the Duaku.

Duaku.

Duaku.

Duaku.

Here he comes.

He's coming to fight John Cena, who just turned heel.

So this is the most famous sighting.

And like I said, there's some pretty cool stuff at the end of this that's still relevant today that people can see and stuff like that.

That kind of gives the Duaku some type of credit.

Credibility.

I like it.

Yeah.

It's all we're ever looking for with Cryptids.

It's all we want.

We rarely get it.

Any credibility at all.

We rarely get it.

I know.

So when I saw this, I'm like, Oh, shit.

So here we go.

We're going back to 1722.

Oh, yeah.

In Northwestern Island.

It was a good year.

Yeah, it was.

What happened?

That was the year.

What did Russia do that year?

Probably killed somebody.

Am I right?

I don't know what happened that year.

I feel like you know that.

They probably killed somebody.

Yeah, like so did the Irish.

Yeah.

So we're still in Neth-neth.

Go with it.

You nailed it.

Northwestern, I meant to say.

Oh, man.

So we're still in Northwestern.

It's super silly up here.

We're still in this area, general area where the sightings.

You're just not even going to say it again.

No.

We're in the general area.

The area where these other sightings that we've talked about earlier are in.

Like that's where all the sightings of this.

If you see it on a map, it's up and left.

Yeah.

Put your finger in the middle of Ireland, go up and then left.

That's where we're at.

That's how you get northwest.

Yeah.

I don't know how to say this, because I realize we're going a little bit more east and north.

I just did this whole fucking thing, but I'm like, yeah, just cross that hour a little bit more this way and that way.

I think you just did it.

We're good.

All right.

We're going like two and a half hours east and a little more north than what I just fucking said.

So everything that Corey said, just forget about it, except for the north part.

You can keep that.

Just move your finger a little bit more to the right now and just up a hair.

It's somewhere right there.

So this is not the area where the other sightings are, though.

It's more inward, more inland.

Yeah.

Compared to there.

Going towards Scotland.

I guess Scotland's somewhere up there.

Do your research, man.

I did.

I told you Scotland's up there.

You keep putting your finger up.

Keep putting your finger up.

You're going to reach Scotland, dude.

Do your freaking research, man.

You're the expert.

Your finger will hit Scotland eventually.

Or you'll bleed.

So the story goes.

That a woman by the name of Grace McLaughlin or Grace Connolly, depending on married or maiden name, I don't know which one's which.

I mean, we're talking hundreds of years.

Who the hell knows?

Was she married?

Yeah.

But I'm saying Connolly was, I don't know which one was made and which one was married.

One of them was married name.

One of them was the maiden name.

Gotcha.

So we'll call her Grace because that didn't change.

Yeah.

Oh, not that we know of.

True.

So Grace lived in Cravelia, which is located on the northwestern part of Glenade.

I thought we were in the northeast.

Yeah.

It's this northwestern part of...

Of the northeastern part.

Yeah.

Okay.

That is how it is.

Okay.

Of Glenade, which is a lake in Ireland.

Glenade Lake in Ireland.

So on September 22nd, 1722, Grace went down to the lake to bathe and wash some clothes.

Oh, freaking hot.

I know.

I was getting a little chubby.

Jeez.

Just reading this.

Right type ofness.

Oh, man.

I don't know what this otter did to her, but it's going to be absolutely disgusting if Corey caught a chub.

Well, down at the lake, a huge monster, and we're talking about a monster coming out of the water.

No other types of monsters.

Nobody thought that except for you.

I saw it in your eyes.

Hey, for the people, he specified.

Son of a bitch.

For you folks.

All right.

We can continue here, folks.

So I won't interrupt anywhere.

I'm taking a nice roll back from the mic.

A huge, huge monster emerged from the water and viciously attacked and killed her.

Oh, damn.

Her body was later found at the lake by her husband, Terrence.

But there's nobody there to see her get attacked.

Nobody was there to see her get attacked.

But her husband, Terrence, then shows up because he was going down to the lake to look for her because, you know, it's getting later.

She's not coming home.

Like, he had to take a bath and he needed supper.

Yeah.

Woman.

Not gonna make itself.

Woman.

Yeah.

He's getting hungry.

So he's like, God damn it, Grace, where are you at?

So he went down to look for Grace.

Golly.

Get her back there to make some supper.

But what he came across was a scene that seemed like a bloody massacre.

And next to her bloody dead body laid the creature that killed her fast asleep.

So some some say that that that's fucking ruthless.

Yeah.

You just kill the shit out of some way and take a nap.

Yeah.

Holy shit.

This thing's awesome.

So like some things I saw it was like laying next to her.

And other things said that it was just laying across her.

So it's like, this is like, you know how like anacondas when they eat a really big meal, they kind of almost go in like a vegetative state and just can't move.

And really, it's just being Thanksgiving night.

For you Irish folk that might be listening to this, Thanksgiving's when America just became fucking badass.

And that's why we eat a lot of turkey and stuff like that.

Mashed taters and stuff.

Yeah, we mash our taters.

Yeah.

Y'all know a thing or two about taters, so I shouldn't be telling y'all.

That's right.

I do like my pierogies, though.

I do like a pierogi.

Dude, we had, I was driving through a town today.

We had to go up to like we're up in Wilkes-Barre today, you know, bigger like city.

You guys go all the way up there to do work.

We had to pick up a truck up there because it was up at the garage.

And we got off at this one exit and literally, so there's like three signs in a row when you got off this exit.

The first one was like fresh homemade pierogies.

Like, hell yeah, that's awesome.

The next sign was for an adult store that had x-rated movie theater that played like around the clock.

And there's some other sign there.

And then the next one was an empanada, which is just Puerto Rican pierogies.

So, buddy, we were sat right there.

We could have spent our day right there.

Pierogies, porn, pierogies from Puerto Ricans, basically.

Yeah.

You could have bought your pierogies, went and sat down, watched some porn, and eat your pierogies.

And I watch that stuff for the story.

Yeah, I just read the articles.

Yeah, exactly.

I read the headings, the titles.

Yeah, the subtitles.

Yeah.

But yeah, I go to those places, and I'm going to be honest with you, this is a confession I have to make.

I hope it's not too revealing on the cast.

I like to eat edible underwear.

They taste good.

I pack them on my lunch.

It's really not a big deal.

Yeah.

They're good.

They're like fruit by the foot, but better.

You get like a six pack, 12 pack, 10 pack.

I buy them by the box, by the case.

How many is in the case usually?

Like 36.

Ooh.

Yeah.

They're like diapers.

Yeah, more or less.

Yeah.

And I don't need to eat them on the weekends and stuff just when I pack them for lunch.

What flavor do you go with?

Oh, they have a wild berry that's pretty good, but I don't need to get too much into that.

That's enough.

Into my lunches and stuff.

But yeah, I thought that was funny that it was just.

Is that considered a dessert?

No, it's just my lunch.

Oh, OK.

Yeah.

No, these are just whip them out of the pack and pop them right in.

OK.

You sexual pervert.

Geez, Cory's over here being a sexual deviant.

I'm just trying to tell you like a good lunch hack.

I'll have to give it a whirl.

Or a twirl, whatever you want to do.

Hell, yeah.

All right.

So good old Terrence comes down the hill and finds old.

Yeah, sorry.

I really I really took us off the beaten path there.

I just know when I saw those signs today, it's like, damn, I got to tell Cory about this.

It's going to enjoy this.

That's pierogies, porn, Puerto Rican pierogies.

That's what I call it.

I mean, I'm but not as just Puerto Rican pierogies.

The three peas.

Yeah, they're fried.

If you don't know what pierogies are, I mean, I know it's more like a Pennsylvania type thing.

Just like dough with mashed potatoes put in them.

With some cheese.

Yeah, some cheese.

Cook them in like butter and onions.

And they're all that's all.

Magnifical.

Magnificent.

I just took them for granted.

When I moved down to Arkansas, they were impossible to find.

I finally found them at the grocery store.

They had Mrs.

T's.

Yeah.

But I remember telling people, like, hey, I didn't realize you guys have pierogies down there.

And they're like, what the hell are pierogies?

I never had pierogies.

So we had like pierogi parties.

Just to like introduce everybody to pierogies.

They're probably like, god damn it.

Yeah, damn, we's been down here just eating grass.

We could have been eating pierogies.

Yeah.

Shit.

All right, we're going back to our boy Terrence.

So Terrence goes down the hill looking for his wife, Grace, because he's getting hungy.

And he sees one of these son of a bitches laying next to her or laying on her dead body, taking a nap, taking a snooze.

Sorry.

So they didn't eat her.

They just like ripped her to smithereens and got so exhausted from.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think you're just a bloody masquerade.

That really is like fucking savage.

Yeah.

She didn't even eat her.

You just laid next to her just because it's like, yeah, kicked your ass.

Now I'm taking a nap and I'll eat you when I wake up.

Yeah.

If I want to.

If not, I'll just go kick the shit out of something else.

I'll fucking eat Terrence.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Pretty much.

Yeah.

Because he heard her whistle before she died and he knew that Terrence was going to be coming eventually.

So upon seeing the creature, Terrence knew immediately it was the Duaku.

Duaku.

Duaku.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

The grief and fury quickly overtook Terrence, who went to get his dagger and killed the beast.

Because if this beast is sleeping, pretty easy to kill something when it's sleeping.

However, as Terrence was killing the Duaku, what do you think happened?

Its mate came.

It's mate came or it just like disintegrated into ash right there, there.

It let out a huge whistle, which alerted its mate.

Well, that's how it did whistle.

Hey, get over here.

I'm a dwebble.

Yeah, I'm a dwebble.

I need help.

What are you doing over there?

So let out a huge whistle, alert its mate from the depths of the lake.

Another duaku emerged.

Scared for his life, Terrence jumped on his horse and hightailed it out of there.

It sounds like a pretty solid story for somebody that murdered their wife.

Yeah.

Just saying.

Hey, it wasn't me.

It was the duaku and its mate.

Yeah.

Yeah.

The duaku chased him for many miles right on his horse's tail.

The chase eventually ended at a blacksmith's forge.

Terrence needed to stop to give his horse a break.

This son of a bitch was tired.

I can imagine.

Running for miles from this duaku.

The blacksmith understood what the creature was capable of, and gave Terrence a sword and told him that when the creature charged, it would put its head right through the center of the horse's body.

When this happens, you need to cut off its head.

Cool.

So he knew that when this duaku came, it was going to target the horse's midsection, and just ram its head right through the horse.

Makes sense.

If you aim for the middle, you missed a little right, missed a little left, you're hitting it.

You're hitting something.

You're going to hit something that's going to bleed out.

Aiming for the middle seems like a solid strategy, I would say.

Yeah.

The beast showed up, charged the horse, and put its head.

Brock Lesnar.

Yeah.

The beast incarnate.

The beast incarnate.

Brock Lesnar.

You can't do it like Paul Hayden.

What a genius.

Yeah.

Love that guy.

Taking people to Suplex City.

Yeah.

So the beast showed up, charged the horse, and put its head right through it, killing the horse.

Oh, really?

The horse is dead, huh?

RAP horse.

Well, that horse is like a necklace.

Yeah, pretty much.

No.

Put its head right through him.

It died.

When this happened, Tyrants cut off the monster's head, killing it, and avenging his deceased wife.

That a boy, Big T.

That a boy.

That's right.

That's right.

So what?

Crack Daddy Mike.

Yes.

So what are your thoughts on the story before I go over the aftermath?

Like, what do I think of the?

Just the whole story, like the, I guess, do you think it's possible, like something like this happened?

I know you like said about like, this is a perfect scenario for like a husband to kill his wife and then play.

Yeah.

I mean, that's, I didn't think about that, but like.

So, all right, I'm going to throw a really crazy theory out.

What if he killed his wife, then ran to the blacksmith, which was actually his lover.

But also I just, I don't know.

The thing, it seems weird that she got ripped apart down there by herself, and this thing just took a nap next to her.

Yeah.

I mean, you kind of have me to where he puts the dagger in, and then the mate just charges him.

Do they have the head?

I don't know.

I didn't see anything about the head.

Yeah.

Okay.

So, there's no, there's no actual physical evidence where he cut this thing's head off.

I don't have any physical evidence.

Okay.

I guess, I guess that's my thought.

In my story, I don't have any either.

That's my thought on it.

The dude probably might have just killed his wife.

Yeah.

That's a good, that's a good thought.

Yeah.

I mean, back in the day, you could say anything.

I think probably just had her taken to some kind of asylum.

Yeah.

Because she was on her period or something.

Yeah.

She was a witch.

Yeah.

Back when men could be men.

The grave of Grace Connolly actually exists and carved on her tombstone is a depiction of the Duwaku and her death.

He doubled down.

Yeah.

He doubled down when he made this gravestone.

Yeah.

Damn.

It can be found in Conwell Cemetery, close to Kinlock in County Antrim.

You nailed all that.

The written details are pretty much illegible due to the age of the tomb.

However, her name and her husband's name can be made out.

There's also a picture of a strange creature that locals claim is a Duwaku.

The creature is shown lying on its back.

Its head and neck arched backward in the final moments of its life, and a spear-like weapon is depicted piercing the base of its neck, with the tip, just the tip, maybe, emerging beneath its body, and a human hand gripping the upper end of the spear.

Her husband has a grave there, too, where he is shown on a horse with a dagger in his hand.

Also, the Duwaku and Graces, or no, not Graces, Terrans' horse are buried in County Sligo, not far from the stone fort where they both met their end.

That he died.

I don't know.

I couldn't find out how he died.

I mean, the horse died.

Obviously, when it got eaten.

So yeah, I'm not sure how he died.

I have natural causes.

Yeah, I'm guessing.

A total hero.

Just yeah.

I like how he's buried with his horse, but not his wife.

Yeah.

Kind of crazy.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm not sure how he died.

Good for him, I guess.

Yeah.

Here's a picture of the grave I put on there.

They can't really...

I guess you can read some of it.

We'll post it on the gram.

But that's a picture.

On Facebook.

On his horse with a dagger.

Okay.

So like, I don't...

It just kind of looks like a horse with a fifth leg.

You know what I mean?

I know what you're saying.

But yeah, I mean, it's...

Take what you want from it, but...

It's a good story, nonetheless.

Yeah.

And there's some type of documentation, so to speak, on the grave.

Yeah.

Whatever it is, I don't know if it's actually a duaku or if it's some other creature, and over time, it changed to this legend, just to make this story more prevalent, more real.

I don't know.

Make kids run scared more?

Yeah.

Because fun fact...

Fun fact?

Oh, you know I love a good fun fact.

I don't think we've had a fun fact of the cast yet.

Do-do-do-do.

Our cast is nothing but fun facts, Cory.

Right.

Yeah.

What the hell are you talking about?

Some...

Yeah.

Some true, some not true.

I don't know.

So Ireland doesn't have any large predators.

I've heard that before.

In the whole country.

Yeah.

Like, I know they don't have snakes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But I've heard that, that they have, like, no predators.

Yeah.

They were just hunted to extinction.

Yeah.

Like, right now, like, the biggest predators they got are, like, badgers, foxes.

40-year-old men that are in the people they should not be into.

Yeah.

Them.

American minks.

Minks?

I put them right up with a good pedophile, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then stouts and pine martins.

Martins.

Which are basically just, like, weasels.

Weasels.

Weasels, basically.

They just kind of have a lot of, like, weasel type things.

Yeah.

They don't got any big things.

Because they all went extinct back in, like, the 1700s or some shit like that.

Do you ever see people hunt with minks?

There's, like, YouTube pages where they'll go to farms that are ridden with rats and stuff, you know, dairy farms and stuff like that.

Yeah.

They'll just send their minks out, and those minks will just absolutely go destroy rats.

Damn.

Then they have, like, a terrier that just goes behind the minks and just brings all the rats out.

They'll go in there and just destroy, like, 30, 40 rats a night.

Like, those, like, savages.

That's a good operation.

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

I guess they're really hard to train because they're so aggressive, but...

All right, so with all the mink talk and everything, oh, got any theories for this thing?

All right, so these theories are just my theories.

Oh, good freaking God.

Yes.

Folks, buckle up.

Yeah, folks.

Folks, these theories are for the people.

For the people, because I like doing my own theories for this shit, because a lot of these things don't have very good theories, so I get my own theories out there, and then I would listen to Crack Diddy's theories.

Yeah, it is good making your own theories.

Yeah.

You never know.

Your theory could be the right one.

Could be.

You'll never know because we won't research it.

I'm going to say it is the right one.

Yeah, I'm not, but that's fine.

But do you have any theories before I dig into my theories?

I want to hear your theories first and then I'm going to make my theory just a little bit better.

Oh, that's a good idea.

Good strategy.

I like it.

So a couple of theories here.

Oh, yeah, I do have a theory, Sturgeon.

I already told you that's one of my theories.

Yeah, I said it earlier.

But I already had it on the paper first.

Whale penis, too.

I don't have that one down.

Yeah, it could be a whale penis.

I'll take a whale penis.

I like whale.

I like the theory of a whale penis.

Yeah.

I don't like whale penis.

Well, you don't know if you do.

Yeah.

I've never eaten it.

Yeah.

Or.

Anyways, go on.

Yeah.

Go ahead.

So could the Duaku be an unknown or undiscovered species?

I mean, that's typically like that's like the big theory for a lot of cryptids.

Like, oh, is it an unknown species, an unidentified species?

Like, could be could it be a relic from the past that survived in remote areas?

It might have characteristics of both a land mammal and an aquatic creature, much like some species of prehistoric aquatic mammals.

So could it be something that, you know, we think is extinct?

And then over time, it just somehow survived without us knowing about it.

I guess possible.

There's a lot of bodies of water, air, but I don't know.

I just feel like that one's always tough, just because we have so many people that go out there exploring and trying to find these things.

Like with all the technology we have nowadays.

Yeah, with all the death binders and stuff like that.

I think they would pick up one on something.

But if this thing could live in the woods also.

Yeah.

Who knows?

What if this thing didn't primarily live in the lakes?

That's just where it's been seen.

Yeah.

No one's ever seen it in the woods or anything.

But this is some kind of big hybrid bear or something, which comes down to the lakes to feed on fish and stuff like that and gets caught and busted.

Digs a big hole to live in.

Yeah.

Or some shit.

I like it.

Could be.

Could be a bear.

Man-bear pig?

Could be.

Could be half bear, half pig.

Yeah.

Half man.

Half otter.

The otter I'm not seeing, but the man-bear and pig I can see.

Yeah.

That'd be a real possibility.

Beaver?

No.

There's no beavers in Ireland.

No.

They're a predator.

That tail, man.

Gotta watch it.

I think beavers are primarily like a North American animal.

We'll go with it.

I'm going to throw fun facts at you.

You're throwing fun facts at me.

I'm throwing fun facts at you.

We'll go with it.

We'll go with it.

Yeah.

Prove you wrong later.

What other theories you have?

Giant otter.

Okay.

Next theory.

No, but the giant...

No, there is a giant otter.

I believe you.

It's just funny.

Really big otter.

The giant otter is an actual species of otter, but it's not native to Ireland.

Where is it native to?

It's native to South America, and primarily lives in the Amazon Basin and the Orinoco River basins.

How big is it?

It is...

it gets between 4.9 to 6.6 feet, including the tail.

Okay.

And it weighs from anywhere from 55 to 75 pounds.

So, and you think, too, and I might mention this with some of the other theories, but even if you have something that's a couple feet in length swimming in the water, it's going to look bigger because of the ripples and stuff like that.

Because the cameras.

And yeah, the shaky cameras, the shaky cameras add, yeah, 10 pounds.

At least 12 pounds.

At least, sometimes 20.

Oh, geez.

You're getting...

Depending what year we're talking about.

Yeah, okay.

And these otters have long, muscular bodies and are very well adapted to their aquatic environment.

They got thick fur, webbed feet, which make them excellent swimmers.

And they're also known for being highly social, living in family groups and communicating with each other through a range of vocalizations.

While their large size and social behavior make them an extraordinary sight, their populations are currently threatened due to habitat loss, poaching, and human-induced environmental changes.

So like, they're not in Ireland.

But, I mean, could there be some other species of a giant otter that's in Ireland that we don't know about?

I guess.

No.

Could be.

I mean, I guess.

I don't know.

I just really want to throw a no.

You have this huge five minute long explanation.

And all I want to say is just no.

No.

No proven facts or any no research at all.

Yeah.

No.

Can't happen.

There is one otter species, one or two, that's native to Ireland.

Like the main one is the European otter.

Um, super pretentious, like the most pretentious otter ever seen.

They smoke cigarettes.

This thing grows from 3.3 to 4.6 feet.

Um, which includes the tail.

That's in all my descriptions.

I don't know why the tail is so, you know, extravagant.

Well, how long is the tail, though?

Because it could make a big deal in the description if this tail is like...

Yeah, if the tail is like 3 feet long.

Yeah, and it's a 4-foot creature.

It's like, okay.

Yeah.

I don't know.

Basically have a swimming rat.

Yeah.

And the European otter typically weighs between 11 and 18 pounds.

So it's a small little fella.

Yeah.

The big tail.

Let's see here.

One that I saw, and I don't...

I can't really get behind this one.

I mean, I saw this one like a large...

They could be large water hunting dogs.

But I feel like if somebody's out and they see this thing, like you're going to see the owner somewhere close.

What if they escape, though?

Yeah, I mean, if they escape...

What if it's some kind of pack of dogs that just became...

Wow.

Yeah, wow.

But also just became like a pack of dogs that escaped and just were really in the fish.

They just became accustomed to hunting the lakes.

So breeds like the Irish...

Dude, I am so good at theories, by the way.

I am like a theory king, as long as you just kind of give me the lead in, for what I should say, more or less.

You just take over.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What if it's a pack of these son of a bitch?

Yeah, you're right.

They're out just hunting these fish and other shit and eating them and...

Well, watch what you say.

I'm copyrighting this as we speak.

So it will take you to court.

All right.

Bring it on, buddy.

This whole this whole this whole thing will be mine.

I'm either going to die from my high cholesterol or Mike's going to take it over from this.

That's right.

One of the two.

We've got two angles.

Breeds like the Irish water spaniel or the New Finland are strong swimmers and could have been mistaken for a mysterious water creature.

And these breeds can get pretty big, way up to like 100, 150 pounds.

They have long shaggy fur that might make them seem like a monstrous beast.

Dude, freaking, I had to look up.

I'm looking up what an Irish water spaniel.

Yeah, dude.

It looks like fucking Bob Marley.

It looks like Bob Marley.

It does.

I feel like this thing isn't a killer because it's probably playing reggae on the weekends, I feel like.

And it's high as shit.

Yeah, dude.

It's just like, no way.

Hey, but the story about it taking a nap, like, I can see that thing lying there taking a nap.

She probably had a heart attack and died, and then that thing came up and just took a nap because it was so high on weed.

Hello, buddy.

What did I find here?

I feel like they blew those little, like, drums that they play down there.

I can't remember.

Michael Scott has them on The Office.

Bo.

Dude, Cory doesn't have a clue.

Bogos?

Bogos!

Yep, that's what they are.

All right, Cory, what other theories you got?

You're going to shit when that shit's right.

Holy shit.

Are they called Bogodrums?

Oh, man.

They're called Bogodrums.

Or maybe they're thinking of Bosco sticks.

I don't know.

Remember you used to eat Bosco sticks in, like, high school?

Bosco sticks?

They were just those breadsticks that you dipped in sauce.

They had cheese in them.

I don't know.

I don't know if I had those.

You probably packed your lunch.

You're one of them.

I didn't pack my lunch.

It's just a steel drum.

That's all it is.

Just a steel drum.

All right.

Well, could have been a Bosco drum.

What did I say the first time?

Bongo.

No, you never said bongo.

You said, like, bobo or something.

Boscoves?

But yeah, you're way off.

All right.

The next theory.

This show's getting out of hand right now.

There's a large fish species in Ireland.

And we got some pretty big fish throughout Ireland.

Sturgeon, which we already talked about, which can grow up to 10 feet or longer.

I find it hard to believe that people would get this thing confused for a fish, though, just by the description.

And especially if it's in the water, and then people are saying it's on the land, too.

Yeah.

Snake heads.

Yeah.

You got other fish, sorry.

Sturgeon, yeah, they can get 10 feet, weigh several hundred pounds, they get big.

Atlantic salmon grow up to five feet, 30, 40 pounds, though some larger specimens have been found.

Pike can grow up to five feet, weigh up to 40 pounds.

Carp, common carp, grow up to three feet, weigh more than 50 pounds.

So, I mean, they were kind of some of the big fish.

So, I mean, I guess if somebody just sees something in the water, they could see one of these fish as possibly be, oh, shit, it's the duaku, you know, maybe.

If that was already in your head, that that was a possibility.

If you're in one of these lakes and you're like, oh, duaku's been seen here, you know, back in whatever.

Yeah, it could be.

If it was a Lugru.

Ooh.

Came over France.

Yeah.

Over the lakes.

Just did a hop, skip, and a jump.

Yeah, it's not that far.

But ain't that crazy?

No.

They run pretty fast.

Yeah.

You have a werewolf theory?

That's right.

The other one I got here is seals.

Okay.

Keep scrolling.

I got seals.

Keep scrolling.

Great gray seals.

Oh yeah, gray ones?

They can grow up to 10 feet long and weigh as much as 800 pounds.

Yeah.

And they have been known to sometimes adventure over into some of the lakes in Ireland.

Oh yeah.

Why not?

You know, these song bitches like to lay on a little piece of land and get some suntan and shit.

Oh yeah.

Me too.

Could be.

So I'm not much more than a beach seal.

A beach seal.

A beach whale.

A beach seal.

I'm not much more than a seal.

I mean, seals get up to 800 pounds.

I'm pushing it.

We'll see.

We'll see.

You give me a couple more months.

Baconators, we'll get there.

Hell yeah, we will.

I'll get you there.

So what on your theories?

If you had to pick a theory that you thought was the number one theory, what would you pick?

And if you don't think any of these theories fit, and you just think that this could just really be the Duwaku, then it is what it is.

I think it's just people knowing the legend of the Duwaku.

The Duwaku, they're out camping or doing whatever they're doing at the lake.

They see a fish jump, they see something run through the woods, a fox, whatever it is.

Well, there's no fox.

There's no predators.

There was a fox.

Oh.

There were some small little critters.

Oh, damn.

There wasn't no big ones.

I was listening to you when you said that.

It's all right.

There's a fox.

I tuned you out for that one.

I'm going to check real quick just to say you're wrong, but I'm pretty sure there was a fox.

But anyway, yeah, foxes.

There are foxes.

Yeah, foxes.

Badgers, foxers, stouts.

Badgers, foxers, and stouts.

And pine martins, and American mink.

Damn.

America.

American mink.

American mink.

Hell yeah.

Hell yeah.

But yeah, I'm just thinking it's just people wanting to see something or witness something that isn't there, and their minds just fill in the blanks.

You know where my biggest question comes though is why?

It seems like every other cryptid or folklore or whatever, there's almost a why behind it as to why this became that in the way of what would be the reasoning for people, just like people want tourists to stay away from these lake regions.

I think it was just like people started building cities and stuff like that, and they didn't want this land to be taken over.

Yeah, that would make sense.

They start spreading this legend hoping that it'll keep people away.

Yeah.

I don't know.

Because I remember when you said about it, it's supposedly very territorial.

Yeah.

So it doesn't want its spacing encroached.

Or did it start with just back in the day, parents didn't want their kids out swimming in the lakes and stuff, just some dangers of them drowning and dying and stuff like that.

So there's no info that matches up with any of this.

No.

Like other legends kind of folklore seem to have.

Yeah.

So that's where my question lies, is where we're missing something here.

Or we're not, which is very likely, but are we missing something?

Yeah.

That's for you folks to decide.

Yeah, folks.

Because we're going on to the folklore score.

Oh, we did.

I'm like a little woo.

My voice, like I almost lost my voice there.

All right, folks.

Corey's ready for the folklore score.

And so am I.

And Corey, I predict you have a 21.

Wrong.

Ah, dang.

But we will do the unveil.

And if you're not sure what our folklore score is, because it has been like two or three weeks since we did it.

Wow.

So folklore score, we rank, we have five categories, spookiness, historical culture, significance, believability, uniqueness, and threat level.

And we rank those one to ten.

So the top score will be 50 for each of us.

We add them together.

Smush them together.

And that gives us our folklore score.

And we need at least a 60 to get on the board.

Corey, do you think he's getting a 60?

Okay.

Like you're in brutal honesty.

So we'll do the big unveil.

A 24.

I gave it a 20.

We had a 40.

A 44.

First 40.

What the hell, I'll be...

Hey, Corey, have we had any 40s?

Yeah, I think it was our first 40.

First 40.

We ever had.

We had 12 40s.

This is a mild myth.

This urban legend offers mild scares and minimal threat levels, providing listeners with entertaining, diversions that may hint at danger but ultimately pose a little risk.

Yeah, I think that's accurate.

Yeah, I think so.

We'll dive into our scores for spookiness.

I gave it a 2.

I gave her a 3.

For cultural, historical significance, I gave it a 4.

I gave it a 7.

I really just...

Because a lot of times, or at least from what I've seen, a lot of what you search in Ireland, Ireland folklore and some of their cryptids and stuff like that, like this son of a bitch comes up every time.

So I ranked them high based off of Ireland.

Believability?

Gave her a 4.

I gave it a 2.

I gave it a 4 because I'm like, okay, maybe it is like a rabid otter that shoots out.

I feel like the fact that you said that, you should lower that score from a 4 to a 3 right now.

A rabid otter who's just a little more pumpier than the other otters.

Yeah, I guess so.

He has a taste for human flesh.

Hey, it could be.

Uniqueness, I gave it an 8 because, I mean, it's weird.

An otter.

It's an otter.

I probably should have went higher.

I gave it a 5.

I was just right in the middle.

Yeah.

And threat level, I gave it a 4.

Yeah, and I gave it a 5.

So, no.

With that.

Critter is going to be added to the board, you son of a bitching quarry.

The boo hag lives to see another week.

She's been hanging on.

She has been hanging on for a long time.

We haven't had an add to the folklore scoreboard since Ouija.

Yeah, that's been a hot minute.

Yeah, and before that, it was Kraken.

Krampus?

Krampus.

Yeah.

I saw the K.

I just didn't look up high enough.

But yeah, Krampus is what I meant.

But yeah, a lot of them are from some of our first couple episodes.

Yeah, so if you guys have any ideas of a cryptid, of an urban legend that you think could make it on our board.

That's not Bigfoot because we're going to do Bigfoot eventually.

He's just really intimidating.

He is intimidating.

It is a lot, a lot to try and get all the information for.

Yeah.

I keep just thinking about Bigfoot, and I'm like, yeah, we'll get to that.

If you have Bigfoot, keep your opinion to yourself.

Keep your Bigfoot in your mouth.

Yeah, your Bigfoot in your mouth.

But with that.

Oh, but don't look at me when you say that.

That's right.

It was that.

I'm CrackDaddyMike.

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Corey, you have anything?

You should tell your I was going to say tell your moms, too.

Hell, yeah.

Give them my number if you know what I'm saying.

I'm CrackDaddyMike and I'm out.

And I'm BKCorey.

It's not the butt crack.

Corey Stupid.

Stupid Corey.